Walking in true DESTINY...

I had to write this because the message is so ingraded in my spirit until I have to take the time everyday to listen to the tape over and over. I go to sleep with it on and wake up to it since I purchased it last Thursday night.

I have this huge confession to make. I don't tend to walk in fear often because I know that it's not from father. 2 Timothy 1:7 says that he has not given us that spirit. Whenever I see fear in my life, I work overtime to eradicate it as quickly as possible. But I do however have ...I don't know what to call it--simply put, I do not want to miss anything and everything that Father has stored up for me. Now I know that plenty of saints like to sing "What G-d has for me...". But to be honest we sing that song lying...Most of us are so far off track that we don't even know what he really had for us. If you could get one glimpse of what he really wanted you to have you'd cry until you were sick to see how far off you really are.

I'm honest with myself. I know I'm off track. Now I just want to get back on. I want everything that father says he has for me. I want my house, my money, any relationship...
You can't handle that can you? If the husband I have now is not who G-d had for me, I hope we can part as amicably as possible. Maybe this is why my marriage has been an all out struggle since day one. That doesn't mean that I don't love him or care but I don't want anything that is not lined up with perfect destiny. Sounds selfish?--probably so. But I am honest about it. Most folks won't be honest enough, with themselves as well as others, to say that they know they are in possession of some things that they know he didn't give them. When I get back home to heaven, I need to know that I did my best to do EVERYTHING that
father wanted me to do. I need to hear "Well done, thou good and faithful servant." Maybe you don't need to hear it, but I do. I understand that everyone won't hear it. I want to hear it. All this hell down here and not have him say that? Whatever!!!

I am constantly aware that as well as it seems that I am doing, I know I am still off track. I can look at my life and see that I am missing it in a ton of areas. I am literally eating up every word my spiritual father says so that I can find myself conforming into the things that G-d predestined for me all along. Now I hear you thinking "G-d is not the author of confusion", that's exactly right--so this confusion that I have had to struggle and live in all this time is not of G-d. They are the error of bad choices and rebellion. God is about peace...
that means

"SHALOM"--NOTHING MISSING, NOTHING LACKING, AND NOTHING BROKEN.

That's not the picture I'm operating in right now.

Now I just need to know how do I get there? What do I need to do first? Pray of course, that's already done. Now I just have to listen and follow. Seems easy enough. But we all know that what G-d requires and asks often pulls on the flesh. We have trained our flesh to be rebellious. Now I have to train it be obedient again--in all things.

Stay tuned...I'll keep you posted on what's happening.

Be Blessed.

Chosen.