Friday, June 30, 2006

Taking the unpopular stand…

Woe unto you, when all men shall speak well of you! for so did their fathers to the false prophets. Luke 6:26
(I’m venting--but it has a purpose still)
I have realized lately that I am becoming more and more unpopular. Not because I am not a good person, an honest person or whatever the case may be. The problem is not me, it’s the words that come out of my mouth or the words that I write. I thought I was past this stage because I am in the company of other Christians, but I guess was wrong.

Most of us encounter this whole spiel when we first get saved and we begin to attempt to walk the way the word tells us to go and we are so on “fire” with our new changes that we preach to anyone who will listen. We just want to share what G-d has done for us with everyone. Sooner or later our “friends and family” extinguish us because our new found life is aggravating to them. They aren’t ready to change and therefore we are wasting our time and energy trying to bring more converts to the kingdom. (besides our walk is stronger than our words). So we eventually get the picture and shut up. Or to keep up with them we compromise ourselves so that we can still hang on to old relationships.
I expect unsaved people to have a problem with me if I am preaching to them and they didn’t ask for it. But other saints? You would think that we would want the truth of G-d’s word because we are claiming him as our Father, we are call ourselves saved and we say we love G-d. So then why you get mad when I won’t validate your mess? Why then do you have to talk about me, get mad at me, want to fight me? What is up with that?

First of all, being saved does not mean that we are perfect or that we don’t have faults or that we don’t suffer from issues. We do. I DO. I struggle with just being me. It’s some stuff in there that I never thought was there. (When you ask G-d to show you yourself, It’s an eye-opener). Nevertheless, as saints we are supposed to set the standard. We should walk and act differently than others. But for some reason when you decide that you will not compromise your walk as another person is more willing to do, automatically I must have some secret sin somewhere or you are then labeled as judgmental and critical? Get a grip! Walking the walk is really not that difficult. The enemy just tries to get us to believe that. And since we encounter so many other saints that aren’t really doing it, it’s easy for us to develop those habits as well. They like to say “Relax girl, G-d will forgive you”. Heffa, I am relaxed!(see I told you, i'm still under construction) Gossiping is relaxing? Since when? And yes he has forgiven me, but does that then mean that I still shouldn’t grow up?! Just because I don’t want to hang out on the parking lot after church and gossip about stuff that doesn’t concern me nor interest me--that’s just me. You do you, I’ll do me. I have been on the other end of enough erroneous conversations to not want to spend all my time doing it about someone else. And there is a big difference between gossip and truth!
It’s so irritating! Just because you ask me something and I don’t validate it or you start to regurgitate some mess and I cut you off does not mean I’m judging you. I simply don’t agree anymore. And yeah I have done my share of mess. But I realize that I did most of that because I really didn’t appreciate who I was yet. So if not compromising makes me unpopular so be it. That’s so high school anyway!
Sheesh! And furthermore, I have been through enough HELL to want to make better choices for me. I am 32--I don’t want to be 50 still making the same idiotic mistakes I made when I was 20. Shoot, I already need G-d to redeem the time as it is! If you don’t mind continuing on as always--have your way.
And don’t take it personal because I have to cut you off because you don’t like my prophet. I can not have you in my space and you are speaking negatively about him. We have to part ways. Simple as that. The word says be careful how you hear (Luke 8:18). Your negativity will contaminate me from being able to receive the words vital to my life. Your negativity will keep me from getting the breakthrough I need and ultimately disconnect me from a man I know G-d gave to me specifically. If you don’t like him, fine. Go somewhere else--find another church. I have hopped around from place to place enough to know they are not all created equal. Remember, it’s not personal. I still love ya, but I’m like Simon Peter in John 6:68--to whom else shall I go?! You may can go, but i'm planted and I intend to stay there until G-d moves me.
It’s the same with the other people at the church or anywhere else, I have to be able to receive a word from them at any given moment. G-d likes to use those we least expect to have the nugget that will deliver us and carry us from one level to the next. Your mess will contaminate my ability to do that.
My point, I could care less about being liked or even popular. And yeah sometimes the stuff ignorant people are saying to me, about me, and doing to me hurts my feelings. BUT--I happen to remember this scripture…
But the king shall rejoice in God; every one that sweareth by him shall glory: but the mouth of them that speak lies shall be stopped. Psalm 63:11

And I happen to know that as long as I don’t fight you back and keep my mouth off of you, he’ll handle things for me. G-d has taught me that if you are doing what he says do, and it makes you unpopular, you're on the right track. I would only be worried if I was suddenly liked by everyone.
Whew…I feel better now.
Be Blessed.

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Being Obedient to the Father…

If ye be willing and obedient, ye shall eat the good of the land: Isaiah 1:19

As a mother this is a subject that is daily communicated in my house. I work throughout the day completing various tasks and I really don’t like to have to repeat myself over and over. I never wanted to be hard on my children but sometimes I have to be to make my point. My daughter often says that I want them to be perfect. And that is a lie. How could I expect something that I know is impossible for them? I have learned that children and even adults, use that crutch as there own bit of witchcraft to get things to be as lenient as they desire. I want my children to be obedient because without discipline there is chaos. It’s a principle that they can’t see that has a greater benefit down the road.

Likewise, I seek to be as obedient to the Father as I possibly can be. I seek to please him. I also remember that when I was out there in the world, there were some things that I suffered as a result of lacking the ability to adhere to the small things. Like for instance, once I decided to date a CRIP when I was sixteen (umm, yeah ME) and even though this boy’s mother warned me that he was no good, I simply believed that she was too hard on him. He however, treated me like a queen. I thought they were mistaken, right? Well, when I decided to end the relationship because he wanted some things that I was unwilling to give, he acted as if he was okay with that. But I later would catch glimpses of him all the time in places I was--I thought it was a mere coincidence. Right up until he called me a told me all the things I did in one day. This boy was stalking me. He eventually stopped, but at the time my brave heart was scared as HELL!

That memory alone should have been enough for me to never not heed that inner voice--which I later realized, was G-d, as it related to relationships and anything. NOT! But only now am I really getting the principle loud and clear. I see myself in the scriptures constantly. The children if Israel suffered a great number of things due to their disobedience. They fought battles that they would have never encountered had they simply adhered to G-d’s warnings. Deuteronomy 28 describes a bounty of blessings that G-d has promised if we diligently “hearken” to the voice of the Lord. Likewise it also details another list of curses if we disobey.

I look at my life lately--like really closely in the last 2 years, and I wonder where I could be today, had I been obedient to Father years ago. I had incredible goals--I still do. Few of which are in my life because I made one decision that turned into 8 more and the 8 turned into hundreds of other things. I am off track and the only way to get back on is through obedience and allowing all the things that are not in harmony to be rooted up. That in itself is a painful process, but the scriptures say that even Jesus learned obedience through the things that he suffered (Hebrews 5:8). Since he is my example, I know that I can conquer this area which diligence.

When I fuss at my kids, I am trying to teach them there are going to be times when they will only get one chance to be obedient. Not heeding me can result in them having to go through a myriad of things that could have been otherwise avoided. In learning this as a mother I understand Father more clearly when he tells me to do something. There is a greater purpose to what he is asking me to do. He sees what will happen down the road when things are not so “hunky dory.” He sees the pain and the heartache of having to take the long way around what could’ve been a short route. He sees me getting off track and trying to have to find my back. He saw it all. I approach listening to him in the small things and the greater ones a little different then I was first saved and leaned on his “grace” as a crutch for half-heartedly serving him. Eventually there were some things that he’s allowed me “bump my head” on because I continued o do things my way and not his. His grace simply kept it from being as bad as it could have been. But I find that it is sad that I have had to let some things get to the wire before I could surrender whole-heartedly.

I find great solace in that had I not disobeyed, I would never have known how great his mercy and grace really is. I also know from all of those experiences that the price of obedience is small in comparison to the greater expense of disobedience. Though I have a long way to go, as I am a true work in progress, I know the distance is shorter now than it was before and that I am far more willing to go the right way.
My kids will surely make a great deal of mistakes. There will be times when they will test obedience as well. I understand all of that. But for me, I am working on getting all lessons right the first time.

Be Blessed.
Feel free to check out my other blog Rivers as it has gone under a revamp for us Ladies!